About being a parent

Paul and I decided it was best for me to stay home from camp this year and come up and visit instead...which is pretty easy since it's only 9 miles from our house. I just can't be at the pace camp goes at. I can't walk all over and help out but then the fibro kicks me in the rear later.
Instead, I was able to spend some significant time with Lydia. I drove her to a couple appointments, and she spent the night a couple of times, because Josh was at camp too. We caught up with lot of conversation while cooking, driving, picking our berries/cherries, and eating. It made the week special for me.
It's been about a week now that Em has been home. Well, actually she wasn't home that long because she and Paul went off to Camp Crestview for 5 days. Even though she had episodes of back spasms she was loving being a part as the camp photographer. She was back in her sweet spot.
Sweet spot: The action of using a skill or talent that creates a awesome satisfaction and fulfillment about life.
If anyone wants to add to my definition, feel free.
Anyway, a week ago, Em, Paul and I were all feeling a little disappointed that all did not work out the way we had hoped it would with her Disney internship. It was just such a let down. Emmy didn't let us down, we just hated to see something she wanted so badly not work out for her.
The experience she had there, though short, still gave her some valuable lessons about being on her own, and about who she is and what is best for her.
I'm proud of how Em handle the situation in that she followed procedure, and did do the best she could. She communicated with John, her R.A. several times about her situation, asking for advice. She made her choices with integrity.
As a parent of two adult children I am learning how important it is to be a sounding board and not a judge. It's easy for me to slip into wanting to give advice before listening to catch how they feel in a situation. I have noticed that listening and being empathetic to their personal view of the world is much better way to build my understanding of who they uniquely are. I guess that's sort of a basic concept to write out, but it's a principle that takes patience on my part to apply. Pretty much, it's giving up control like I used to have; when my role was raise them with values and my views and ideas. The important parts of those like faith, integrity, love and compassion; those remain. Now I get to enjoy how they put their personal spin on those values.
It might seem kind of funny why I am now talking about this since Lydia has been an adult for awhile, and Em has been moving into that place for the past year. It has been a process for me to now say that I truly feel comfortable in my role as their Mom with adult children.
This is a new day.
My girls are both beautiful, young adults. I'm on the sidelines of their lives cheering them on. I get to enjoy their great personalities...gee, I sound kind of...shall we say...biased? :>/)